Things Worth Dying For
by dying.to.find.out
Summary: Series of 100 drabbles written for a challenge. Sirius POV, follows the changing relationship between Sirius Black and Lily Evans from their sixth year through to the bitter end. R&R please! Rated T for now, that might change in later chapters.
1. Frog

This is a series of 100 drabbles written for .' "100 Drabble/Oneshots Challenge" on HPFC. They will follow the changing relationship between Lily Evans and Sirius Black, told from Sirius' perspective, from the beginning of their sixth year all the way through to the very end. Enjoy!

Frog

"Up front, Mr Black, if you please," Slughorn says in his booming voice. "Next to Miss Evans, I think. I daresay she could teach you a thing or two about potionmaking!"

The professor's guffaw is lost on the sixteen year old boy as he gathers up his things and slugs his way to the front of the class. James sends him a look that is at once sympathetic and envious. If he could, he would gladly change. With Evans as his partner for the entire year, there's no chance of any shenanigans with the boys. He might even have to- perish the thought- do some _actual work_.

The redhead glares at him as he takes his place next to her, clearly no more enthused about this turn of events than he is. He grimaces in her general direction and slumps back in his chair as Sluggy finishes pairing up the class. He hardly even notices that the instructions for the day have been given until he is shoved none too gently by his new partner.

"Black!" she says loudly. "Are you going to help me with this potion at all?"

She is clearly exasperated with him, and they've only been partnered up for about ten minutes. He sighs dejectedly as she pushes a container of squishy, brownish red….things…. at him.

"Can you just cut these up into small pieces?" she asks him in a low voice. He stares at her for a moment, then sits up and pulls the container towards him. Ugh, frog livers. He sneaks a look back at the boys, jealous that Sluggy has partnered James with Remus, then turns back to the amphibian organs in front of him. Lily is still watching him, waiting. He rolls his eyes and gets out his knife.

As he roughly chops the frog livers, he can feel her eyes on him. He is sure she is glaring. He dumps the cut up livers into the steadily bubbling cauldron, ignoring Lily's protests. He doesn't flinch when the contents of the cauldron explode, showering him and everyone within a ten-foot radius with green goo.

This is going to be a long year.


	2. Applesauce

Applesauce

He strides confidently into the Great Hall, his three best friends close behind him. Peter lags behind the rest of the group, yawning. He is not surprised. Pete was never much of a morning person.

He loves mornings, and in particular he loves non-morning people. It's easy to catch someone off-guard when they're still half asleep. He takes his seat near the middle of the long table, and immediately begins to load up his plate with bacon and scrambled eggs.

The four boys are silent for a few moments as they eat their breakfast. It doesn't last, as he knew it wouldn't. James has spotted Lily sitting a few places down, and wonders aloud what she'll have for breakfast today.

"Applesauce," he says without thinking.

The other three boys turn to him with incredulous looks on their faces. His own face remains calm, as he struggles internally to cover up his mistake.

"Prongs, mate, I've done more than my share of spying on Evans for you," he says with a grin. "She always eats applesauce for breakfast on Tuesdays, with just a dash of cinnamon." He adds a quick eye-roll for effect.

James' jaw drops. He continues his damage control.

"Bet you five sickles she does. Go on," he grins at his best friend, knowing there is no possible way he could lose this bet.

"You're on!" James says with a grin, and all four boys turn simultaneously to Evans. She, of course, notices, and demands with a frown, "What are you four staring at?"

"Nothing," reply the boys in unison, in a slight sing-song voice.

She is still suspicious, but she accepts their excuse for now and turns back to her friends. The boys watch, anxious, as she scans the table. She reaches for the bowl of porridge….then changes her mind and picks up the applesauce that sits next to it. She adds a dash of cinnamon.

The boys let out a breath none of them realized they were holding. They turn back to him, and he is already holding his hand out to James.

As the raven-haired boy digs in his pockets for the silver, he asks, "How did you know she would go for the applesauce, Pads?"

He tries his best to keep the tremor out of his voice as he replies, "Like I said, mate, you've set me to spy on her far too often."

James accepts this explanation, and Pete has fallen asleep, face first in his plate of eggs. Remus, however, is watching him curiously. He feels uncomfortable under his friend's gaze, and looks away.

He pockets his winnings, and turns back to his bacon and eggs, but they've lost their appeal. His eyes fall on the pot of applesauce, and he considers it for a moment before he reaches for it.

Maybe it's time he tried something new.


	3. Evil

Evil

He's walking down the hall with James, chuckling over their latest prank.

"Who knew Snivelly looked so good in pink?" James says, doubling over with laughter.

He joins in, remembering how it felt to see the greasy-haired Slytherin so humiliated. He opens his mouth to say something, when a voice sounds behind him.

"Potter! Black!"

It's her, and she's angry. He should have expected this. He pivots on one foot, then bows to Lily.

"My dear Evans, what can we do for you today? Finally decided to give ol' Jamesie here a chance?"

Her eyes flash as she responds scathingly, "How could you two do such a thing? Sev was just eating lunch, he had done nothing to you-"

James tries to interrupt, and she rounds on him. "You know what, Potter? I actually thought that you might have learned your lesson after what happened by the lake last spring, but clearly I was wrong! We've been here less than a week and already you're tormenting people for no reason! You are nothing more than an arrogant, self-centred bully!"

"I thought you weren't friends with Snivelly anymore, Evans," he hears himself saying. "What do you care if we turn his robes pink?"

"And you," she spits at him, "are no better than he is. Sev may be well on his way to becoming a Death Eater, but how, pray tell, are you any different? Maybe the Sorting Hat messed up, and you should both have been in Slytherin! God knows you'd fit right in."

She glares at them for a moment, as though daring them to respond, then turns on her heel and stalks away.

James laughs it off, and continues walking to their next class, but he is left staring after her, stunned. That hit a little too close to home. His place in Gryffindor has always been a source of pride for him, a symbol of how different he is from the rest of his pureblood-manic family. To be thought of as worthy of being a Slytherin….well, it hurts. Even coming from Evans, it hurts.

He shakes his head slightly, then turns to follow James. Maybe, he thinks, they should tone down the pranking a bit. Keep it harmless. Maybe then Evans wouldn't think to place him on the same level as his low-life family.

It's with a heavy heart that he walks to his next class.


	4. Hufflepuff

Hufflepuff

He's helping himself to a large slice of chocolate gateau when he notices. She's sitting a few places down the table, with her friends as usual. But tonight something is different. He can't quite put his finger on it.

He's alone tonight. Remus is in the hospital wing, as the full moon is tomorrow night, and James and Peter are in detention for causing trouble in Transfiguration earlier in the week. He watches her as he eats his pudding, trying to be subtle about it.

All at once, it hits him. There's a new person sitting with her tonight. Davey Gudgeon, a seventh-year Hufflepuff, sits next to her, laughing at something she's just said.

His stomach turns, and suddenly his chocolate gateau doesn't look so good. He drops his fork and pushes the plate away, revulsed.

There's got to be some reasonable explanation for this, he thinks desperately. His stomach does another flop as her laugh sounds through the air. He sneaks a glance in her direction. She's hugging Gudgeon, and the badger is grinning like a loon. The discomfort in the pit of his stomach increases, and he feels as though he might vomit.

It must have been the steak and kidney pie, he thinks determinedly as he gets up from the table. It must have gone off. Yes, that is the only plausible explanation. It has nothing to do with her. Nothing at all.

As he leaves the hall, his mind is full of pranks involving the Hufflepuffs.


	5. Crab

Crab

"Black, would you please _pay attention_!"

He's in Potions again, and Evans is screaming at him. By now he's used to it. Mostly he just does what she asks him to. He's found it's easier to cooperate, rather than elicit her considerable wrath. But today, he's not willing to play nice.

Last night was rough. He and the boys had a difficult time keeping Remus calm during his transformation, and he's feeling it now. His whole body is aching, muscles he didn't even know he had are screaming in agony every time he moves. In short, he's exhausted, both mentally and physically. He's also angry.

He's not angry at anyone in particular. He's angry at the world. He can't help but feel that it's so unfair that Remus, the nicest, kindest boy he's ever met, has to deal with lycanthropy and everything that comes with it. He feels that he should be doing more to help his friend. At the same time he knows he's doing all he can, and that Remus appreciates every second. But that doesn't stop him feeling frustrated.

Today, he's taking it out on Evans.

He affects a grin, as he says to her, "Bit crabby today, aren't you, Evans?"

His tone is light and teasing, but she doesn't catch it. Her eyes flash, and her reply is quick and scathing.

"That couldn't be because I have to put up with you all afternoon, now could it?"

He's stung. He can't think of anything to say to that.

"You really hate me, don't you Evans?"

The words are quiet, an almost inaudible whisper, and he's not sure if he said them aloud. She makes no sign that she heard him, and so he sighs and roughly begins to stir the simmering potion.

"Anti-clockwise, Black," he hears Evans say, but the venom is gone from her voice.

The ghost of a smile flickers across his face as he stirs in the correct direction. All of his anger and frustration has faded.


	6. Itch

Itch

He's restless today.

He's glad it's the week-end; otherwise he'd be having a lot of difficulty paying attention in class. Merlin forbid he should have to slug through a Potions class with Evans while he's in this mood.

He wants out of the castle. It's raining pretty hard, though. If he went outside now he'd never hear the end of it from the boys. He's really not in the mood for wet dog jokes.

So he roams the corridors instead. He knows he should be working on that Transfiguration essay McGonagall set them earlier in the week, but he wouldn't be able to concentrate. He's humming some love song he heard on the WWN last night. He doesn't remember what it's called, nor does he want to. He just wants it to keep his mind busy.

He turns a corner and stops abruptly as something blocks his way. He takes a step back, and realizes it's a girl. He looks closer. It's Evans, and she's dropped her bag. Quills and parchment scatter across the stone floor.

He drops to his knees and starts to help her collect her things. If she is surprised, she doesn't show it. When all her belongings have been safely returned to her bag, they both stand. She brushes off her skirt. He runs a hand through his hair, in a move reminiscent of James.

Awkward doesn't even begin to cover it.

She clears her throat. "Er, thanks, I guess," she says in a soft voice. He's sure he sees a slight pink flush rise in her cheeks, but it's gone as soon as it came.

"No problem," he replies effortlessly, making a concentrated effort to keep his hand from jumping to his hair again.

She opens her mouth, like she's going to say something, then thinks better of it and smiles instead. "See you around, Sirius."

She brushes past him and walks away down the corridor.

He doesn't know how long he stands there, unmoving. But all of a sudden it hits him, and he sets off down the corridors with a smile on his face, that restless itch gone. The day stretches before him, beautiful despite the rain, and he can't help but let out a quick bark-like laugh.

_She called him Sirius._

A/N: I'm going to try and do at least a couple of these every day...the goal is to have all 100 written by the end of the month! Wish me luck! Also, if you're reading these, please take a minute or two out of your day to leave me a review. If people are actually reading this, that might be incentive for me to keep going! R&R please and thank you! -Kate


	7. Green

Green

He's sitting in the common room late at night. He's managed to snag one of the really cosy armchairs nearest the fire, and he's feeling pretty good about life in general. The boys have all gone to bed long ago, but he's not tired.

He doesn't know how long he sits there, staring into the flames, nor does he care. It doesn't matter that he has to be up in only a few short hours for classes.

Footsteps, light and cautious, sound behind him. He turns his head to see who it is.

It's her. She's wearing a thin dressing gown over a short red nightshirt. Her hair is pulled back into a messy ponytail, and her eyes look a bit puffy. Has she been crying?

"Oh," she says quickly as she notices him sitting there, "I'm sorry, I didn't realize anyone else was down here, I-"

He cuts her off. "Are you okay?"

The question is blunt, and he regrets it as soon as the words leave his mouth.

"No," she whispers softly, staring resolutely at the carpet.

His next question is slow in coming, hesitant. "Do you want to talk about it?"

Her reply comes immediately. "No."

"Okay," he says, and turns back to the fire. A moment later she sits in the armchair next to his. She tucks her legs into her chest and rests her chin on her knees.

They sit there in silence for Merlin knows how long. At last he risks a glance at her, and notices tears streaming silently down her face.

"Merlin, Evans," he says softly. "Why are you crying?"

It's as though his words have opened a gate, and suddenly she's sobbing openly and telling him about her sister and the letter she received earlier that day- something about a wedding- before her words become incomprehensible and she's left with only her tears.

He doesn't know how it happened, but he's sitting next to her with his arms wrapped around her small frame and she's crying into his chest. He murmurs comforting words to her as she lets all her pain and frustration out. Eventually the tears dry up, and the two sit there, entwined on the cushy armchair, neither one willing to let go.

After a while she pulls back from him, and it's as though all her walls have been put back up. She smiles at him, eyes shining, as she says, "Thanks, Black. I needed that."

He looks directly into her eyes as he replies softly, "Anytime, Evans."

She murmurs a hasty goodnight and wanders back up the staircase to her dorms. He knows he should follow suit and try to get some sleep, but he finds it difficult to get up from that armchair. When he does make it to bed, his dreams are full of women with pretty green eyes.


	8. Paper

Paper

He's sitting in the common room again. It's been about three weeks since he comforted Lily in this very room, and she hasn't spoken to him since. Well, except for Potions class, but even there it's not the same. If she speaks to him at all, it's a curt instruction. No emotion, no smiles, nothing. It's as though that night never happened. They're right back where they started.

To be honest, he's not sure if he should be thankful for this or not. On the one hand, he's finding that he misses talking to her, even if it's just a quick hello in the halls. But on the other hand, he's afraid of what might happen if they actually talked- afraid of what he might reveal. Heck, he won't even admit it to himself.

The boys are all in detention, so once again he finds himself alone. He's sitting in his favourite cosy armchair near the fire. She's settled herself at a small table near the window. The room isn't very crowded at this time of night.

He can hear her quill scratching across the parchment as she works on one of the many essays they've been set this week. It's driving him mad.

He resists the urge to look at her. He forces himself to continue staring into the fire. Across the room he is sure she is doing the exact same thing, forcing herself to work on the essay. Or maybe she isn't. She does love homework, after all.

He can't help a small grin. The two of them couldn't possibly be more different, and yet they share so many similarities. He's thought a lot about her sister over the past few weeks. From what he gathered the night Lily confided in him, she and her sister used to be close, until it was discovered that Lily was a witch and the sister wasn't.

He knows how that feels. He knows what it is to be the black sheep of the family. He wonders if she knows that she confided in the one person at Hogwarts who was most likely to understand what she is feeling. Somehow, he doubts it.

He is brought back to reality by the realization that the scratching of her quill has stopped. He can't stop himself from looking; he turns his head just in time to catch a glimpse of her as she heads up the stairs towards her dorm.

He turns back to the fire and sighs. Maybe when the boys get back he can convince them to pull a prank on someone. Maybe some Slytherins. He needs a laugh.

A/N: Hello! Sorry it took me so long to update. Life caught up with me, as it so often does. Hopefully I'll be updating a lot more regularly from now on.

Also:

To the couple hundred people who have read this story so far, and especially to the few who actually took the time to add it to their story alerts: Seriously? None of you could spare thirty seconds to leave me a review? It's not hard, really. It takes next to no time, and I don't care if it's a super long, detailed review or not. Even just a few words, like, "I liked it" or even, "Meh, I've read better" would be enough. Please. I'd really like to know what you guys think.


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